OK, I knew it was going to be bad, but I had not idea how bad it was going to be. I actually gained a pound this past week. I can't tell you how depressed this made me. No really, between the horrible weekend that I had and having gained a pound I really had to focus on the positive in my life this morning to keep from doing something stupid. (Not actually hurting myself, but just freaking out.)
Of course the questions come. What in the hell am I doing? Why am I putting my body through this for something that isn't working anyway? How can I have gained weight when I AM NOT EATING???
After a lot of soul searching, I realized that this is indeed all of my fault. Like I said in my previous post, I have not been exercising. On top of that, to be honest I have been cheating. Here's the thing...I have been experimenting with my diet. Just seeing what I can and can not tolerate. Things that I can tolerate...fried food, hersey's kisses, chocolate cake. And what should I NOT eat, fried food, hersey's kisses, and chocolate cake. In addition to that, instead of eating my 1/4 cup of food, I have pushed it a couple of times. I haven't been measuring my food. Instead, I have been eating until I am full. TOO MUCH!!!
So, anyone out there that thinks that weight loss surgery is an easy out I hope you realize how very wrong you are. Starting today, I am back on it. No chocolate, no fried food, measuring my food, AND exercising. My diet has been good today, I have had no chocolate, and I took my boys to the mall and we walked 1 1/2 laps. I also have started wearing my step counter. I am really thinking that if I get back on track, next week will be better.
Oh, one last thing. About my step counter. My plan is to keep track of how many steps that I take a day. Today I didn't put it on until 10:30, and I got in 4837 steps. I thought that this was really good. It was a lot more than I was used to walking. So, I checked my stats on-line and according to the website I saw it said that anything under 5000 steps is considered a seditary lifestyle. *sigh* I need to get up to 10,000 steps a day. But I do realize that this is not going to happen overnight, but that is my goal.
You are doing so great, Tams. Last week you said that "others have lost this much by now". That could also be messing with your head during this. Try not to compare yourself to others. This is YOUR journey. There will be peaks and valleys, but the only thing that is important is getting to your destination. Love you much, Amanda
ReplyDeleteThanks Amanda. I really appreciate the support. It doesn't help that I am very competitve. But you are right, I gotta focus on me. Not easy for me to do.
ReplyDeleteLove you as well,
Tams